First Cruise
In my
last article I told you how my first cruise
job came about and told you about my first night
on the ship.
Things
went smoother once I got into the swing of things.
However, on this first job I was not considered
a headline entertainer. I was Cruise Staff/Entertainer.
And the cruise staff position definitely came
first in the eyes of the company.
 When I was contacted for the job, I had little understanding
what it meant to be "cruise staff." It turned
out that this meant I was to: direct and assist
passengers during embarkation and disembarkation
(called gangway duty); socialize and mingle
with passengers daily; conduct daily events
such as; Ping-Pong, shuffleboard, golf, basketball,
horseracing (cutouts powered by the roll of
dice), bingo, cocktail & singles parties;
assist in producing evening shows with lights,
props and sound; host game shows, i.e., newlywed
game, talent show; act and host for Captain's
reception, dancing with passengers; and selling
shore excursions.
That
my friends, is quite a work load (plus performances)
seven days a week. Although the work is not
hard, it does have a number of negative facets.
Foremost, I believe it cheapens the image of
the performers. When the passengers see you
standing at the gangway at 7:30 AM saying, "watch
your step," in the afternoon running a shuffleboard
tournament and selling bingo cards, they really
don't see a professional entertainer when you
take the stage. They see a gopher that knows
"some nice little tricks." It is about perceived
value.
As you
can tell I don't agree with the staff/entertainer
combination. Fortunately, I didn't work that
way very long. Nevertheless, it was a great
training ground for me as a young person. I
was on a microphone daily, in many situations,
wearing many hats. I learned to think on my
feet, and learn to be comfortable in any public
speaking arena, from the serious to the absurd.
The only
way I'd encourage someone to take a job, as
cruise staff/entertainer is if they wished to
one day be a Cruise Director or work in a cruise
line management office. Both of these positions
would benefit from a solid background on shipboard
activities.
My real
experience in the world of professional entertaining
was limited. I had to learn fast during the
first week onboard. I was expected to know how
to use the ship's orchestra, map out my light
and sound cues to the tech crew, take curtain
calls and all the logistics of my show in a
full-size theatre.
 My act was fairly modest then.
My main show was twenty-five minutes long and
appeared in the Americana Showroom and sat 900
people. Two shows in one evening. If I remember
correctly, it consisted of a split-fan routine,
vanishing stereo, the cigarette in coat, linking
rings, an in again/out again routine with a
watch steal, and the misers dream. As I always
shared the stage with other acts I had to cut
out many of my other routines that tended to
be messy. I had a real thing for the long-salt-pour
back then but obviously couldn't leave the stage
all seasoned with sodium!
 I also had a thirty-five minute
show in a smaller room, "The Blue Lagoon Lounge."
(Yuck!) The show started at 11:30 PM. The room
accommodated about 500 or so. I don't remember
much of the original act. This was the spot
that I used to try new material. It was a harder
room to work as the stage was mostly surrounded.
This was actually beneficial, as I had to find
or create routines that could be worked anywhere.
This paid off in the long run, as many of my
bread and butter routines developed there.
Now let
me tell you the unusual story of my greatest
trick to date: Snagging Kellie Williams in my
tangled web of magic and mayhem. Or did she
snag me???
 On the days that the
tour excursions were sold, it was my job to
make announcements to the 1800 people coming
in to the room on how to purchase their tickets.
I was basically crowd control and I just stood
at a microphone repeating the same instructions
and throwing in some wisecracks for fun. Kellie,
being a purser (financial and hotel personnel)
sat directly behind me and actually sold the
tickets. Once the crush of ticket buyers subsided
I could leave.
On one
occasion, there were only a few people left
in the room and I turned to Kellie and said,
"Well, it looks like I can go." She breezed,
"Sure, bye." And I was off.
What
I didn't know was as I walked away, she told
the man at the desk buying tickets, "Do you
see that guy that just left?" "I've asked him
out three times and he keeps turning me down."
Now,
I have no idea what made her say this. We had
barely spoken to each other at all. She was
just being silly to this guy. Well he says,
"Don't go anywhere!" And he takes off after
me.
I'm standing
in the elevator. I have just pressed the button
to go down to my room when an arm thrusts into
the closing elevator door. This man, (his name
was John) pries the doors open and says, "COME
WITH ME."
He marches
me right back into Kellie, who is desperately
trying to hide under her desk. John says, "This
beautiful young lady just told me that she has
asked you out THREE times and you've turned
her down." "Are you nuts, man?"
I could
see how embarrassed Kellie was getting so I
interjected, "No sir, you have it backwards,
I've asked her out three times and she's turned
me down."
John
replied, "Okay, before this cruise is over I
want the two of you to go out on a date."
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And we did.
We went on a tour of the Tulum ruins of
the Yucatan Peninsula in Mexico as a first
date. It was love at first sight really.
We both knew right away that we would
stay together forever. |
| Not long after,
Kellie hung up her pursers uniform to
become my partner in the wild and often
wacky world of magic!
|
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